Whirling Week

What a strange week.

1) Went to Solo Showcase by myself - it was fantastic!
2) Decided to join a Meet Up group for a free screening of Catfish and pre-movie drinks. Couldn't find the group at the bar, couldn't find the group at the theater. Saw the free showing anyway. Came home and realized that the group is meeting NEXT week!
3) Wanted to join a different Meet Up group for a long walk up to Twin Peaks and dinner in the Mission afterwards. Parked my car in the mission and took BART to the meeting/starting point. Realized I'd lost my wallet and turned around to search for it. Missed out on the hiking group. Could not find wallet.
4) Filed a police report, called credit card company to cancel card, called friend to cancel check they'd written me.
5) Get on Facebook and see that someone has found my wallet and contacted me through Facebook! Wallet is intact, but missing its $22.
6) Went on an interview for an assistant chocolatier!
7) Spent 4 hours at a Kinko's cutting a 836 fot ream of paper into sheets.

Phew.

Sunshine on San Francisco Sunday

Amazing that the sun is out today! SF is in full swing this Sunday - there's Sunday Streets at the Great Highway, They Might Be Giants at the free Stern Grove Musical Festival! I'm going to a free theater performance tonight.

This week:

1) did an interview at Burlingame Antrhopologie
2) made raw chocolate chip cookies with oats, brazil nuts, dates, and chocolate chips!
3) finally visited Rainbow Grocery!
4) started a jar of vanilla extract in bourbon
5) went to a free performance at Stage Werx!
6) cleaned the heck out of my apartment - again!
7) made tiny harnesses for my rats so they can wander around my apartment - they are not fans! But they do look like the flying monkeys from The Wizard of Oz with their little red vests - does that make me the wicked witch?

I think I'll bike over to the Great Highway to see everyone enjoying the open roads and sunshine. Being out in public without a specific goal is unnerving for me, but not having anyone to accompany me to places I want to go shouldn't stop me, either. It usually does... but I don't want it to.

Santa Cruz Sunday

What a fantastic week!

1) The Conservatory of Flowers!
2)the farmers market, wine and chocolate at Cocoluxe in the Haight!
3)Arizmendi Bakery and Bananagrams - strawberry and lemon ricotta bread, shortbread cookie, Chai tea!
4) Nightlife at California Academy of Sciences with visitors from Santa Cruz, Miami, and Spain!
5) fresh sea urchin served in a shell with spines waving and fresh raw scallops served with a slice of lemon @ Live Sushi in Potrero Hill!
6) wine, brain puzzles, card games at Love Apple Farm in Ben Lomond!
7) hiking in Santa Cruz! wading around barefoot in a rocky river bed! watching horses carry riders through the forest! climbing around like monkeys!
8) eating at Cellardoor in Santa Cruz! crazy good braised short ribs with smashed potatoes and kale! strawberry compote with lemon verbena ice cream!
9) cocktails and card games at 515 in downtown Santa Cruz!
10) fantastic light breakfasts and lunches before making sports! fruit, toast with ghee and jam, potato salad made with yogurt and fresh herbs from the garden!
11) lots of cats! a fancy cat named Winchester!
12) rose water and watermelon juice! spinach and orange juice!!

What fun!

Sunday Blogger

I'm going to try out a new habit where Sundays are now blog days. Sundays are great because they allow me time to look back on the last 6 days and also plan for the next 7.

They are also a farmer's market day and farmer's markets are full of inspiration, community, and the best of the best stuff for you - fruit and veg!

Sundays used to be the only day of the week my parents had off from work. They were tired from a long week of long days - 4am to 5pm! We usually went out to breakfast and went grocery shopping as a family. Most Sunday afternoons my mom and I went to the mall. We lived in a suburb of gated communities and the mall seemed to be the only recreation around. It never occurred to me to suggest trips to the park, bicycle riding, kayaking, or any other out door activity. In retrospect I would've liked more of that, but my parents were probably just glad to have a slow day to enjoy.

So this week there were wine and crafts on Monday! Babysitting Tuesday and Wednesday, with a trip to the farmer's market on Wednesday evening. Thursday I volunteered at the Museum of Craft and Folk Art - the theme was book making and there were plenty of crafty folks who turned out. Friday I played a board game with friends - we also stuffed ourselves silly on barbeque!

Yesterday I kind of fumbled through finishing really old projects and trying to start up new ones. I get so lost, side-tracked: re-vamping, editing, re-starting, throwing out, circling, circling, circling my projects. Then I go online and look at what other people have accomplished and it throws me into a spiral of jealousy and defeat - how could I EVER be as talented, hard working, stride-making, clever, stylish, brave as they? This is useless activity! I have been making progress on pushing through the doubt, though. Just charging straight ahead, fuck ups and all! Sometimes it gets easier.

This week I'm looking forward to spending time with Raquel. It is her birthday! An old friend is flying out to see her and we are all going to spend a few days in Santa Cruz and have a fancy dinner nearby. It will be nice to get some sunshine and have lots of laughs.

Today I am going to the farmer's market and charging through some scattered projects. Wish me luck! Here is a video about procrastination:

Unemployment

I've been unemployed for about 5 months now. That's surprising to me but I quit my job in March and it's August now! I haven't accomplished what I'd hoped to in this time. What have I been up to?

Early on I took up an odd/assisting job to a freelance artist working on a stop animation short and random projects. I liked being able to make things all day! I made molds, sculpted clay, carved foam, did some painting, while wielding a glue gun. The atmosphere was way too unstructured for my taste. I wanted more direction, more of a schedule and time line to feel like I/we were steadily making progress. There was a lot of 2 steps forward and 1 step back when I had to re-touch and re-make props and characters due to their getting lost and damaged in dis-organized heaps.

I went on vacation to Spain and Italy with my parents which was a wonderful thing I would not be able to do with a regular job.

Upon returning the assisting job kind of... dried up. It didn't seem like I was needed anymore or maybe the fit was wrong. I didn't get paid for that work, but we never really did officially agree to terms.

I finished some projects that had been half abandoned when I gave myself the excuse that working made me too tired to work on anything for myself.

Now I'm babysitting twice a week for a little rent money. It's good to slow the drain on my checking account, but I'll only be able to keep this up for another 4 months or so.

I really need to find a way to make more money.

Somehow I've slipped into another malaise where my apartment is in a bit of a shambles, I've stopped exercising, and my personal projects are all half started.

I wonder if I should be working on a portfolio, pushing myself toward more challenging personal art work, designing crafts that will sell, hunting that unicorn of a great creative paying job, or taking any job that will pay the bills. Any? All? A combination?

Well something needs to change.